It was my last day in college today. Only exams after... Many of you would think that a sense of nostalgia would be taking over me now and that am gonna write about how am gonna miss those 'golden' days, those days I spend with my buddies basking lazily in the sun and so on and so forth. Wrong!!!! My feelings are quite contrary to this regard. I know at least 10 guys who feel the same way as I do. Until today, it was 2 weeks since I went to college. I missed my final arts day, sports day and a chunk of the long awaited 'demo' days. I remember that 2 to 3 years back I used to plan in my mind how MY demo days would go. Now when the time finally arrived, I slacked. No enthusiasm... no feeling. Truly, I don't regret not going to college or not participating in any of these events. Some guys in class came with autograph books. Others cried... Still others made promises of meeting up 5 years from now at some place etc... I don't mean to disrespect anyone but... BULLSHIT!!!!
I did not feel sad even as I left school. In fact the farewell was one big party, with only some teachers crying. But the days before the farewell, I was really sad and depressed. I was nostalgic, I felt all the ways I mentioned before. I agree that my college life did not reach my expectations. Or did I aim too high??? I'll never know. It doesn't really matter now, does it??? Four years just went like that.
Now I stand at the doorstep of a new world. I don't know what it holds for me. Well... that's future for you... You never know what it holds for you... Whatever it does am true to my heart when I say this... " Am ready for it. Take your best shot"
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Bears, Bulls and Deers
A week more of class... Some in my class say they are sad to leave college. Some say they'll miss 'those golden days'. For a boy who has not been to any of the class tours, any arts festival and have just the required percent of attendance and too with a chunk of duty leave, I don't have to explain my 'emotions'.
At this junction I evaluate my last 4 years. What have I gained? What have I lost? What have I learned?
Gains... I have always been rich in the matter of friends and in the past four years I grew even richer. Frankly, I did not expect to find any true company out of my school. Though I found only a handful, they are still with me and am happy they happened. I believe that, except for boozing, smoking and having an affair, I, along with a friend of mine have done everything, anybody can imagine, and even more, one can do in a city like Trivandrum. The lessons learned from these experiences have certainly helped us become more mature and more wary of the world around us.
The past four years were a mixed curry for me. Disappointments happened in regular intervals, a large chunk of which came in the form of results. My college days turned out to be a bit of disappointing too, because, even though I tried I could never really enjoy my time there. In the beginning I used to go back to my school to find my peace. A sense of calm always filled me when I entered the gates. Never has any other place appeared so inviting to me. Who doesn't want to be in a place where you are known, loved and respected.
Lessons learned were plenty.The first and most important one was that emotions have no place in this world. It has been very difficult, but ever since, I have tried not to let any of my decisions be lingered by emotions. After this, I have done only things that I like, and have been officially labeled a 'rebel' for it. Another lesson I learned was that if you believe that you are right you must stick with it no matter what others think about it. This belief has seen me through a lot of really tough times, many of which were really unpleasant.
Unlike my other posts I was more serious in this one. I really want to write more and more in this regard... But I don't think am ready to share myself with you people. Maybe in the future...
And no am NOT writing this because of any particular event that happened recently and CERTAINLY NOT because any heart break or such stuff. Yeh be warned against asking me anything in this regard either personally or through comments. I MEAN IT!!!!!
At this junction I evaluate my last 4 years. What have I gained? What have I lost? What have I learned?
Gains... I have always been rich in the matter of friends and in the past four years I grew even richer. Frankly, I did not expect to find any true company out of my school. Though I found only a handful, they are still with me and am happy they happened. I believe that, except for boozing, smoking and having an affair, I, along with a friend of mine have done everything, anybody can imagine, and even more, one can do in a city like Trivandrum. The lessons learned from these experiences have certainly helped us become more mature and more wary of the world around us.
The past four years were a mixed curry for me. Disappointments happened in regular intervals, a large chunk of which came in the form of results. My college days turned out to be a bit of disappointing too, because, even though I tried I could never really enjoy my time there. In the beginning I used to go back to my school to find my peace. A sense of calm always filled me when I entered the gates. Never has any other place appeared so inviting to me. Who doesn't want to be in a place where you are known, loved and respected.
Lessons learned were plenty.The first and most important one was that emotions have no place in this world. It has been very difficult, but ever since, I have tried not to let any of my decisions be lingered by emotions. After this, I have done only things that I like, and have been officially labeled a 'rebel' for it. Another lesson I learned was that if you believe that you are right you must stick with it no matter what others think about it. This belief has seen me through a lot of really tough times, many of which were really unpleasant.
Unlike my other posts I was more serious in this one. I really want to write more and more in this regard... But I don't think am ready to share myself with you people. Maybe in the future...
And no am NOT writing this because of any particular event that happened recently and CERTAINLY NOT because any heart break or such stuff. Yeh be warned against asking me anything in this regard either personally or through comments. I MEAN IT!!!!!
Friday, April 4, 2008
BANG! BANG! BANGALORE!!!!
I know tis a little late for this post. Pardon me for the delay. These events happened 2 weeks back. They redefined the way I think on several subjects. It was one trip that opened my eyes and helped me take a giant leap towards nirvana
As i boarded the train, with my buddies, for Bangalore, the last thing on my mind was to get recommended for the Indian Navy. We found our coach and before getting on, as any passenger would do, checked our names on the list. But we went a bit further. Checked the whole list. Jackpot!!!! F19,F21,F22,F18.... These are not USAF fighter jets. These were our fellow passengers. Interesting journey lie ahead of us and we could not have asked for a better start. As the greenery sped past us outside we spent our time chatting and at times flirting with the F's.
Bangalore did not disappoint us one bit. It gave us more than we expected. Having arrived one day before the reporting day we had ample time to live the 'yeh dil mange more!!!' dream. Lodging was provided by our school mate, partner in crime, Adarsh A.K.A Pothan. Wonderful flat. A cool looking room mate...Norman. Come evening and so did the last member of our gang Bimal from NLSIU. Pothan's flat was near his college...Ramaiah College of medicine. Man!!! The whole time I spent in that campus I could not find one 'not good looking' girl. "Welcome to Bangalore city" was the chorus I heard in my mind when I saw them. The localites in the gang were unamused. As the sun set behind the tree tops we reached Ground Zero. Brigade Road. I don't know who named it, but whoever did had a wild imagination. Mc.D's, KFC's, Puma, Reebok, you name it and the place has it. After feasting our stomach and our eyes we moved on to a mall nearby. Garuda. There it stood spread eagled luring us towards it. The world is indeed a 'beautiful' place to be in if you know where you ought to be. We shopped a bit... A T shirt each for me and friend. But the bill was in 4 figures.
Every single day in B'lore we went to brigade and garuda, ate from Mc.D and KFC, ate umpteen number of 'softees' and did what every bachelor of our perspective would do.
Afer the 5 days of interview, the Navy guys told me to fuck off from Bangalore... While all others who dint get, complied, I refused. Stayed back for another day to satisfy the party animal inside me. I payed for it...big time. Before going back to my den I decided to book the return bus ticket. That was when I realised that the hungry animal in me had eaten away all my money. Not to worry 'cause I had my ATM card. Since twas an International debit card it was suppose to work in many bank counters. Unaware of which all, I entered the first ATM i saw. No luck. Then another and another... The same story. For the better or worse it got blocked. A wonderful start to my last day in B'lore. I returned and payed an advance. I still had to find the rest of the money. I decided to go to Pothan's as planned and think about this stuff later. We chilled that night. My other partner in crime could not join me 'cause his room mate got whacked in the head for tryn to be a hero.
The wise man, my dad, had asked me to take a check leaf with me just in case something like this cropped up. Next I turned to the one thing that has never let me down at such direst of situations. THE INTERNET. After locating the nearest branch of the bank, I resorted to the good old way to track it down. 'Ask'. The nearest branch turned out to be 13 Kms away from where I stayed. Since I was penniless I walked the whole way. After 55 minutes of walking viola there she lay, inviting... By the time I got back to Pothan's twas time for me to leave. We grabbed a quick lunch and I bid farewell to Bangalore with tears in my eyes and a solemn promise to return in the future. But that time with more cash!!!
As i boarded the train, with my buddies, for Bangalore, the last thing on my mind was to get recommended for the Indian Navy. We found our coach and before getting on, as any passenger would do, checked our names on the list. But we went a bit further. Checked the whole list. Jackpot!!!! F19,F21,F22,F18.... These are not USAF fighter jets. These were our fellow passengers. Interesting journey lie ahead of us and we could not have asked for a better start. As the greenery sped past us outside we spent our time chatting and at times flirting with the F's.
Bangalore did not disappoint us one bit. It gave us more than we expected. Having arrived one day before the reporting day we had ample time to live the 'yeh dil mange more!!!' dream. Lodging was provided by our school mate, partner in crime, Adarsh A.K.A Pothan. Wonderful flat. A cool looking room mate...Norman. Come evening and so did the last member of our gang Bimal from NLSIU. Pothan's flat was near his college...Ramaiah College of medicine. Man!!! The whole time I spent in that campus I could not find one 'not good looking' girl. "Welcome to Bangalore city" was the chorus I heard in my mind when I saw them. The localites in the gang were unamused. As the sun set behind the tree tops we reached Ground Zero. Brigade Road. I don't know who named it, but whoever did had a wild imagination. Mc.D's, KFC's, Puma, Reebok, you name it and the place has it. After feasting our stomach and our eyes we moved on to a mall nearby. Garuda. There it stood spread eagled luring us towards it. The world is indeed a 'beautiful' place to be in if you know where you ought to be. We shopped a bit... A T shirt each for me and friend. But the bill was in 4 figures.
Every single day in B'lore we went to brigade and garuda, ate from Mc.D and KFC, ate umpteen number of 'softees' and did what every bachelor of our perspective would do.
Afer the 5 days of interview, the Navy guys told me to fuck off from Bangalore... While all others who dint get, complied, I refused. Stayed back for another day to satisfy the party animal inside me. I payed for it...big time. Before going back to my den I decided to book the return bus ticket. That was when I realised that the hungry animal in me had eaten away all my money. Not to worry 'cause I had my ATM card. Since twas an International debit card it was suppose to work in many bank counters. Unaware of which all, I entered the first ATM i saw. No luck. Then another and another... The same story. For the better or worse it got blocked. A wonderful start to my last day in B'lore. I returned and payed an advance. I still had to find the rest of the money. I decided to go to Pothan's as planned and think about this stuff later. We chilled that night. My other partner in crime could not join me 'cause his room mate got whacked in the head for tryn to be a hero.
The wise man, my dad, had asked me to take a check leaf with me just in case something like this cropped up. Next I turned to the one thing that has never let me down at such direst of situations. THE INTERNET. After locating the nearest branch of the bank, I resorted to the good old way to track it down. 'Ask'. The nearest branch turned out to be 13 Kms away from where I stayed. Since I was penniless I walked the whole way. After 55 minutes of walking viola there she lay, inviting... By the time I got back to Pothan's twas time for me to leave. We grabbed a quick lunch and I bid farewell to Bangalore with tears in my eyes and a solemn promise to return in the future. But that time with more cash!!!
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